Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] If you've ever followed sales advice that you were just like, ew, or maybe you didn't say ew, but you knew you should say ooh, and you did it anyway, and it killed your momentum and, like, your confidence.
[00:00:20] We're gonna talk about that today. Listen, because I want you to hear.
[00:00:25] I. Hear me. Hear me when I say this.
[00:00:28] You have been right all along.
[00:00:32] The problem wasn't you.
[00:00:35] It was the mismatch. It was the mismatch. And today we are diving really deep into why your personality. You.
[00:00:48] You. You're the biggest sales edge that you have. And while why forcing yourself into someone else's playbook kills your results. And also how to unlock what I call your authentic sales DNA, your distinctive natural advantage trademark. Listen, it's part of the new system that I'm rolling out called Savvy and authentic Selling System. And if you did the acronym in your head, you know it, it's sassy.
[00:01:23] Because, yes, selling with SaaS, having a sassy selling style not only feels good, and it does feel, oh, so good. It is going to be your next level of success. So I'm going to break down the exact traits that influence trust. This isn't just fun. Although fun is a good thing. We're gonna. We're gonna break down what are the exact traits that influence trust?
[00:01:48] The sales psychology. Because I do have a psychology background behind why some people buy from you and why others don't, and why that is okay, and how to sell and align in a way that you feel like you're naturally connecting with people.
[00:02:05] So you can stop feeling bad that you don't like the way you're being taught. You can stop hustling, and you can start feeling like, I love me. I am enough, and it's fun to simply be me.
[00:02:21] I once had a woman tell me that she was not quitting her business because, you know, there's two type of quitters in business. They're the people that quit and actually leave and go start something else. And then there are the people that quit and stay, and they just kind of, you know, don't do anything and think that things are gonna magically work out for themselves. And I will just, spoiler alert, they don't. But she was telling me she felt really bad because she loved what she did. She'd been doing it for, get this, seven years, loved every bit of it, but had, like, slowed down, was taking time off to find herself. You've heard all the things because she didn't like feeling fake.
[00:03:09] She didn't like, feeling pushy. And honestly, it was emotionally exhausting for her. But she was conflicted because she loved what she did. She loved what she would set up. She loves the products that she sold. But she hated being told, you have to do it this way when she knew this way didn't work for her. And I'm telling you, that's a lot. That's a lot of dedication. Listen, Linda, if you've been doing it for seven years and you know the truth lies in you being you, let me just give you permission. Now, you go be you, girl. Because ain't nothing like dedication for seven years and not getting what you want. You've. You've got. You've got to go for it.
[00:03:53] And I believe her when she said, I've used all the scripts, I go to, all the things, I hire coaches, I do the training, but every little bit of it doesn't feel like me. And for a really long time, I will tell you, I didn't understand that.
[00:04:09] And I understand now why I didn't understand that. But back then, I didn't understand it because I was like, just do it. Like, it works for Marcy. And what one person can do, so can another. But the truth is, if you feel like you're acting the entire time, it's never going to work out for you.
[00:04:25] And what ended up happening is she thought, well, I'm sticking around because I love the relationships I formed and what I'm doing. But the problem was for her and for many of you, and I will tell you, guilty as charged. She realized that the problem was she was trying to sell like someone else.
[00:04:46] And I actually know that story really, really well because I saw this on a much larger scale. I. I was the chief field development officer, which is a fancy word for chief sales officer, for, like, a $350 million brand. It was a very big brand. And I used to run the conferences. Like, I was in charge of how the conferences and we had, like, four a year were laid out. And we would hire in the big guns. They had a speaker budget like I have never seen before.
[00:05:19] And we brought in the big names, like, people that you would 100% know.
[00:05:25] Mel Robbins, John Maxwell. Big, big names. And the hardest spot to fill was always the spot of, can we find a good authentic sales trainer?
[00:05:40] And I'm telling you, I could spot the ick from, like, a mile away. Like, what happens is you go and scroll these sites, and I could. I could literally tell from their pose that. Like, that crush your arm pose. No, we're not. No, no. And I would read how they sold themselves. And of course, we tried very hard not to put those people on stage. Although one time a friend of someone influential in the company is got on stage and I was sitting. I remember sitting in the back of this conference room with like, I think at the time we had 12,000 people. And this person was going on and on in a way that I was like, in slow motion. I wanted to. Although I didn't. I wanted to run to the stage and just be like, no, we don't sell.
[00:06:35] Like, I literally. I was like, no.
[00:06:40] And I wanted to apologize profusely to the entire audience who, by the way, gave him a resounding mediocre to negative score.
[00:06:50] But, you know, I have to tell you what I learned then is that if your sales strategy or techniques involve pieces, artifacts that should be in a museum, like, fax that order form over.
[00:07:06] No. Hard. No.
[00:07:08] Run, do not walk. Get a clue. A clue. If it's in the Smithsonian Institute and it requires part of the sales, no, absolutely not.
[00:07:20] But here's the tricky thing. Even our best practices session, and every convention has it. Like every summit, every con vidcon we've been to, we've been to a lot of those things.
[00:07:34] Every one of them have, like, hey, here's the best, best practices from Gloria, who's doing really, really well, and they share their tips in earnest. And I have seen people give really good advice, honestly, not just in sales, but we are talking about sales here. Give really good advice. I mean, pure gold for them.
[00:07:56] Like, for them, with their personality, with their market, with their period of time that they were using that particular technique.
[00:08:09] But the same advice, like, it takes for like 80% of the audience.
[00:08:17] And what I see in, in, like the whole convention industry as a whole is that. And actually because of social media as well, I will say this. Um, people love to amplify the loudest voices. And that's kind of like saying, hey, the person with the biggest megaphone, they have the best advice. And the truth is, is that that loud advice isn't necessarily aligned with your heart.
[00:08:42] And I will also tell you that people buy from you because of your personality. And sometimes these very loud big personalities, they literally just don't work for you.
[00:08:59] And you were right. That's okay.
[00:09:03] The most effective presenters that we've had, and we did have many, presented in a way that people could listen and see and, and feel.
[00:09:16] Feel is so important and feel themselves doing those things. I mean, I, I do remember back in the day, People. And you can hear this. Yeah, but that's you. When people say, well, that works for you, because that's you. You trying to convince them that they can do it too actually doesn't help. What you need to do is you need to find out, well, how can you make it you?
[00:09:42] Because the bigger truth is, and we talked about this in episode 5, 90%, 99, 0. 90% of your sales success comes from personality, not your pitch. So it's not what you say, it's not how you say it. Although people love a good script, it's not when you say it, it's personality.
[00:10:07] And personality isn't just being friendly. It's not just having charisma. It's how you process information.
[00:10:16] It's how you build trust. And it's how you naturally make people feel safe enough to buy.
[00:10:23] And that's what makes authentic sales DNA so powerful. The DNA part, it is the authentic, which means distinctive, right? It's the distinctive natural advantage that you have. It's about turning your natural way into. Into your own system to build trust, to shorten sales cycles and to increase retention.
[00:10:49] Remember, people are always asking themselves, can I see myself, like, going on a journey with this person? Can I see myself making this work with them?
[00:11:01] That's the question they're always asking themselves. Okay, so pillar number one of savvy authentic selling SaaS I so love, that is your authentic sales DNA. Your distinctive, natural, natural advantage. Say that 10 times fast. Distinctive, natural advantage. Think of it like your trust and your connection engine. And I want you to think about that. That's really important because remember that 90% of why people buy, it's. It's this.
[00:11:35] When it's running smoothly, you close more sales at full price, your buyers stick around even longer, and selling feels natural instead of force.
[00:11:48] And there are three components here. There's distinctive traits.
[00:11:52] That's the unique things about you that instantly create trust.
[00:11:58] There's natural, your natural communication style.
[00:12:02] You know, the way you explain things, the way you teach, the way you connect.
[00:12:07] And then there's audience match points and value congruence, which we are going to talk about. Those sound like big words, but it's really the overlap between what you stand for and what your audience believes. Boop. There's the shared belief and identity alignment.
[00:12:27] Mm, that's good. That's so good.
[00:12:31] When you lean into all three, you can create faster trust and rapport, lower your price resistance, make buying feel like the obvious next step and increase retention. Because your clients feel like, well, you know, they're deeply connected to you.
[00:12:48] So let's break these down one by one. First, distinctive traits.
[00:12:53] Distinctive traits are the human things. The things before you start pitching the little things about you that make people like you. Like before you've pitched the thing like who you are.
[00:13:08] That's the likability bias in action.
[00:13:12] Likability bias means that we buy from people that we. And we all know this, that we know like and trust, right? But it's the last like and trust part that this really matters with.
[00:13:23] Then there's this similarity attraction effect.
[00:13:27] This is this component that says we're drawn to people who feel like us.
[00:13:33] So your distinctive traits are huge.
[00:13:38] The things that you maybe have been trying to hide, that you've been trying to push aside because they're not what Gloria does, those are the things honestly and truly that have probably been missing this whole time that could skyrocket your business.
[00:13:54] Now, this doesn't mean that you have to be exactly like your ideal client. It means that you have to reveal the sides of yourself that feel relatable.
[00:14:04] All right, so the first component is distinctive traits. Distinctive traits are the little human things about you that people like, you know, before you pitched and got all weird, you know. This is a combination of a likability bias, which is a nice little psychology term, and similarity. The similarity attraction effect, which basically just means this.
[00:14:28] We are just naturally drawn to and comfortable with people who feel like us.
[00:14:35] That's not news to anybody. But when you actually look at it in the components of sales and marketing, it makes a lot of sense.
[00:14:43] Now, it doesn't mean that you have to be exactly like your ideal client. That would be weird. It means that you reveal pieces of yourself that actually feel relatable.
[00:14:54] So a lot of the things that you've been hiding, pushing aside, and thinking that maybe you shouldn't show are probably the things that. That fall under your distinctive traits. Like, for example, maybe you're a big fan of early morning walks.
[00:15:11] Maybe you're a big fan of coffee in the morning. Like coffee, sunshine, and journaling. You know how you see people on social media and there's a lot of B roll of them doing kind of things, and you say to yourself, self, why? Why do I care?
[00:15:27] Because that's this in action. They're showing you, hey, while I'm sitting here and I do this, I'm not going to lie, while I'm sitting here drinking my coffee, which I love. It's a ritual I love.
[00:15:39] I really do believe that I'm connecting with people that Also sit in the morning and daydream about coffee dreams. I call them coffee dreams, right.
[00:15:50] I sometimes I walk with my, my phone, I talk about going for a walk. I'm trying to share the sides of myself that other people can relate to. And you should too when you share those rituals.
[00:16:05] Other people who have the same rituals are like, aha, same, same. Maybe you talk openly about wanting to build a business like around your family schedule in a non spammy way.
[00:16:20] And that's also attractive to other people.
[00:16:24] Your dream clients might really enjoy seeing your life and juggling kids or grandkids, or going shopping or having trouble with technology or trying to vacation and pack. Like those are all things that make the right people think she gets me in their head. They're thinking, a clue, a clue. This is someone who I could see wanting to do business with, you know, or maybe now that I know anybody like this, you use humor.
[00:16:58] Maybe you are a little bit self deprecating or you have one liners. Listen, Linda. That people appreciate and that makes them feel drawn to you.
[00:17:08] So the key is, and I do, I do want you to hear me here, the key here is that these traits are not manufactured.
[00:17:16] They're simply noticed and they're amplified.
[00:17:21] So what works in your favor are your quirks, your passions, your lived experience.
[00:17:29] These things are built in trust. Accelerators. So bam, push the pedal to the metal.
[00:17:39] Number two is natural communication style. What is your natural communication style? Okay, reason. The reason communication style is so important here is because the easier it is for someone to follow you, like get you, the more competent and trustworthy you seem.
[00:17:58] Now where the opposite of this comes into play and why so many of you are like, I don't know why that doesn't work for me. It's, it's this.
[00:18:07] If you're communicating in a way, a script or a tactic, right, that is not natural to you, that fights your natural rhythm or your audience's natural rhythm, that you're creating friction.
[00:18:26] And you don't. If you don't know that, you'll keep doing it. But this is why this is so important. I want you to get like, if you hear something, there's a difference between, oh, that's a little outside of my comfort zone. And that's not me, and that's not my audience. And I will say this, the idea here isn't to throw the baby out with a bath water.
[00:18:47] The idea here is to find a way to make it work within your communication style.
[00:18:55] Now some of you are storytellers, others thrive on Checklists and like, boop. I need those clear action steps. Some use big energizing gestures. I mean, I used to love. And. And this was the thing that always. That always made me a little crazy when I was doing conventions and talks and stuff. Everybody likes, like, the big, big, energetic person.
[00:19:21] And knowing this, I always had to. I struggled with trying to explain to people, no, you don't understand. I get that you want the big gregarious people and you want the people with all the hype, but there's so many other people that want someone calm. There's so many other people that want someone to just give all the meat and not be funny or energizing or anything. Like, people need to see themselves if you expect them to learn how to sell.
[00:19:51] I used to tell people when I would prep them to speak, be who you are and really lean into that. Because there's a lot of people out there just like you who are going to appreciate your style, your technique, and what you have to offer.
[00:20:05] So again, the mistake here is forcing yourself into a style that doesn't fit. You can't be me, I can't be you. And that is a good thing.
[00:20:16] You know, we used to also have to do videos and people always wanted, like, give me the energy, give me energy, energy. And I'd be like, just, could you just let them be who they are? Like, just let them be who they are? Not everybody needs to be super magnetic. Some people can be quieter. Some people can be more straight to the point. Like, all of that really matters. And I gotta tell you the one thing, what we all hate.
[00:20:44] And I'm. I'm. I'm like, I'm breaking it all down. I'm, like, bringing back the curtain so you can understand this all.
[00:20:51] This is the one thing it gets me every time, the exaggerated hype. You know, the person who shows up and everything is exciting and, whoa, you are, oh, it's going to be so amazing. And they're just hype, hype, hype, hype, hype, hype, hype. And you're like, I just want to go back to the Wendy's commercial. Like, where's, where's the meat?
[00:21:11] Like, hype is. First of all, nobody regularly talks like that. Nobody.
[00:21:19] And the dogs are going crazy.
[00:21:23] Nobody can naturally do that either. And that inauthenticity is a problem for people when they try to duplicate that. Whether you're selling or communicating, it's actually the same.
[00:21:39] The easiest way to find your style is to notice how do people naturally respond when you're not trying to sell them.
[00:21:48] That is your baseline.
[00:21:50] And last but not least, we're going to talk about the big words, value congruence and audience match points.
[00:21:58] This. Just think of this as your selling edge.
[00:22:02] Sales is never about who has the slickest offer. It's always about who feels the most right to buy from.
[00:22:11] And that feeling of right, well, that happens when these two powerful forces line up. When you have value congruence and you have audience match points, man, you have created really deep alignment between what you believe and what your audience believes.
[00:22:32] This is where your strengths, your style, and your audience's values overlap.
[00:22:40] And it matters a lot because belief skyrockets, price resistance drops and retention improves. This is where your personal values like integrity, balance, creativity, like woo. These are the things that magnetize you to your audience and them to you.
[00:23:05] And that alignment says, without any words, we see the world the same way. And it makes them trust you, trust you faster, feel safer investing in you and seeing you as someone that they want in their corner.
[00:23:21] Some examples are like, maybe you hate chemicals in your products. Maybe you don't like unnatural ingredients.
[00:23:29] Maybe you don't like spammy sales techniques. And you talk about these things.
[00:23:34] Maybe you like a lot of family time. Maybe you like soccer mom life, cheerleading mom life, grandma life, exercise, cooking. Those are all things that, when your audience sees you talking about it, they're like, same, same.
[00:23:51] That's value congruence. And when people scream and they do, I want authenticity, or they say, authentic selling, authentic market, this is what they mean. Like, they're. And it's hard, y'. All, it's hard because when you show up as you, that's scary. You may lose some followers and on Instagram, you may feel awkward because you've never showed up as you. But I'm telling you, this is your secret sauce.
[00:24:25] Now, conversely, this is also why sometimes talking about your after, not so much your before, your struggle, during the journey you're after, like, all the success you're having. This is why sometimes you're seen as unrelatable, by the way, because now your audience feels like we don't have any shared values. Like, I don't know if you're trying to help people overcome, let's say, financial barriers. Well, like you showing you and your fancy cars and your six yachts and your luxury jets doesn't really resonate with them. It doesn't because they're still figuring other things out, and that's the conversation that they want to have. So when you hear things like meet people where they are. This is what we're talking about. When you hear things like, hey, meet people in the conversations they're having in their own head, this is what we're talking about.
[00:25:25] And this also is why a social media strategy is so important. If you are just posting whatever or following other people. Oh, this is the thing. Oh, I. Please, please hear me when I say this. Those of you just following what other people post and then can't figure out why it's not working for you.
[00:25:46] It's this. This is what I'm talking about.
[00:25:49] You want people ultimately to say, this is my person.
[00:25:54] And maybe it's your love for your doodles during your zoom call. Like, you guys just heard my dogs barking. Like, there used to be a time that. That horrified me.
[00:26:02] Now I'm like, relatable. I mean, who doesn't have dogs that bark during their podcast recordings or their recordings or their zoom calls?
[00:26:11] Your commitment, you're working around your. Your schedules, your kids, all that stuff. Stuff. All the things that you think make you discredited actually do the opposite. I mean, I. I remember when we first started out back in the day when there were fax machines and there was this really seriously flawed belief that, like, you can never show the hard parts. You have to always show the good parts. Because. Because otherwise you would, like, ruin people's belief.
[00:26:47] Well, now what science is saying is that the opposite is actually true, that people actually want to see you struggling and then getting back up the hill. People want to see you having a setback and then a comeback. Those things are really important to people.
[00:27:03] So in short, audience match points and value congruence is where you and your audience click like a little puzzle piece. And then you know how puzzle pieces are kind of hard to take apart?
[00:27:17] That's the value, and that's what you're going for.
[00:27:20] So you never have to shy back from your failures. You never have to shy back from a bad month. You never have to shy away from the things that you think other people really don't want to see. Because the people that you are looking for, the people who are indeed looking for you, like you just the way you are, with all your learning and all your excitement and all of your tenacity.
[00:27:46] I have to tell you, inauthenticity is definitely. Is far more damaging than saying the wrong thing.
[00:27:55] I have a very successful friend who is a C suite executive for a publicly traded company. Big, big mucky muck. And if I told you the company, you would definitely know it. And one of the Things that she and I have always helped each other with is authenticity. No matter where we are, what we're doing, it's always about just being authentic. There are times that when I call her whining, what I really want her to do is sympathize, and she doesn't because we have committed to being authentic in our careers and our career advice to each other.
[00:28:27] And she exhibits something I call the Jillian effect, or I could call it the Jillian impact. When I call her and complain about something, she's. I've. She said things like this to me. Well, don't be mad just because they know how to play the game better than you do. Or if you're going to be in corporate, you've got to learn how to play the corporate game. And there are rules. And right now, you're just not good at it.
[00:28:48] And I was always like, ow, that hurts.
[00:28:52] But yes, super, super true.
[00:28:55] We valued and had this crazy congruence together because we knew that that's exactly what we both needed.
[00:29:09] So why I bring that up is because the people that you are looking for also are looking for you.
[00:29:16] Like, you. You in all of your flaws, in all of your goodness, like, just the way you are. Which should bring a huge sense of relief to you because basically what I'm telling you is just go, you're perfect. Like, definitely follow the podcast. But, like, you know, you're perfect just the way you are. More of you. Like, more cowbell. Like, more cowbell. More. More of you.
[00:29:44] Let's see more of you.
[00:29:48] Over the next seven or eight episodes, we're going to really lean more into this topic because it's the 90% of why people buy. And I really believe in my heart that not enough people are talking about this. We're going to break down the sales personality archetypes so that you can identify yours. We're going to lean into it and we're going to start selling in a way that feels effortless and works. And you're going to love it.
[00:30:12] If you want to start now, I've actually created something called your unique sales edge map. Oh, wouldn't you love to be able to map out what your unique selling advantages are?
[00:30:27] Yes. Say yes. Your distinct, natural advantages. We're going to help you break those down, write them up, and so that you can see all the facets of your personality and how they help you. So if you want that, just DM me map or hit the link in the show notes, because you don't need a new personality to succeed in sales you just need to sell in a way that's true to the one that you already have.
[00:30:54] And listen, that, plus a little sass, you're good to go. Have the most awesome week. Listen over and over, share with a friend. Oh, don't forget to leave a comment. Leave a comment and I'll see you next time.
